Beep Beep!  Beep Beep!  Beep Beep!  I hate that clock with all my heart.  I’m surprised I haven’t broken it yet from the past 10 years of me smashing it just for it to turn off.  But today was different somehow.  I didn’t smash it, I just stared at it.  This was the last time I would ever hear this clock.  The last time I’ll be awakened by this old piece of technology that was given to me from my mom.  She gave it to me when I was 8 because I could never get up for school in the morning by myself.  So, she went through her old stuff and found a dusty clock that was given to her from Grandpa.  Since the first day I had it I hated it, but I’m not sure anymore.  Something about this clock is special to me.  A taste of home?  Even as I went through this dilemma, the clock continued to sing its song, which drove me insane.  So I hit it yet again, shutting it off.  

 

I sat up in my bed and looked around my room, the room I spent my teen years in.  The room where I grew into my own.  My hoodies were hanging on the wall beside the little weight set I got for Christmas in 2022.  2022.  Can’t believe that was 5 years ago.  Five years can definitely make a difference.  My TV in the front center of the room, my computer sitting next to the door.  I would spend hours playing video games with my friends.  My messy closet sitting beside my desk and the carpet flooring, it was then realized that I was going to miss this place.  I reached down for my phone, which was on the floor charging as usual.  As I opened Spotify, I realized my airpods were nowhere to be seen.  I groaned as I rolled out of bed to find them.  I told myself when I first got them that I would keep up with them.  I knew that I wouldn’t, but I told myself I would.  My airpods have been through a lot.  I once forgot to take them out of my pockets and they ended up in the washing machine.  It took weeks for them to start acting normal again.  I smiled to myself from that thought as I went into the bathroom.

 

It wasn’t long after I started to brush my teeth when my brother, Drew, entered the bathroom, as he did every morning.  I groaned to myself because I knew how this was going to end.  He would say something to me about how I brush my teeth or do my hair.  The typical younger brother insults.  But there were no insults today.  Instead, he took a cup of water and dumped it on my head, laughing.

 

“Was that really necessary?” I said looking at him, fighting the urge to do something back.

 

“No,” he said smiling.  “But you probably did something to deserve it.”  I rolled my eyes, looking back at my mirror.  “What time are you leaving?” he asked as he grabbed the mouthwash, knowing that I was going to use it next.

 

“After I eat breakfast,” I replied.

 

“When will that be?”  Drew always wants to know when things are happening.  He never wants to miss out on anything.

 

“Who knows.  Why are you asking?  Do you not wanna see your big brother leave?”  He pushed me because he knew that I was right.  Drew wasn’t cut for being a single child.  He needed someone to keep him company at all times.  That used to be me.

 

“Of course I will,” he said quickly.  “Who else is gonna drive me to places I wanna go to?”

 

I chuckle slightly.  “You got a point.”  Lately, Drew and I have been going to different places and spending some time together.  The last trip we went on, we had gotten caught in traffic and had to wait 30 minutes.  The entire time, me and Drew both had to pee.  Once we got home, we raced to see who was going to get to the bathroom first.  I’m gonna miss him though.  Even though he’s mean and eats all my food, I’ll miss having his company.  He is my brother after all.

 

After I finished, I went back into my room and got dressed in the clothes I had laid out for myself the previous night before.  Then I collected my essentials (two chargers, phone, necklace, etc).  I still couldn’t find my airpods.  I asked Drew if he had them or if he knew where they were.  He said no, but I can’t trust my 15 year old brother.  I walked out of my room and went downstairs.  As I escalated down, I remembered all the times I’ve fallen down and up the stairs.  I smile to myself, making sure that I don’t take a wrong step and slip.  I spot my mom in the kitchen making her signature blueberry pancakes.

 

“It smells good in here,” I say cheerfully.  After she turns off the stove and places the pancakes on plates, she turns around and hugs me.

 

“My baby boy,” she says lovingly as we embrace.  I smile.  “Did you pack all your things?”

 

“Yes ma’am.”

 

“Including underwear?”

 

“Yes ma’am.”

 

“Did you double check?”

 

I laughed.  “Yes ma’am”

 

I find it funny when I stand with my mom.  A couple of years ago I was shorter than her, and how she’s the one who has to look up at me.  I don’t let it get to my head though, however.  Even though I am taller than her, she still tells me that her arms are long enough to reach up and smack my face if I ever do something stupid.  Height has always been a weird journey for me.  I remember a time when I was only 4’11 in the 7th grade.  7th grade feels like an eternity ago.  It feels too far away.  So does my childhood.

 

I fix myself a plate while looking around the kitchen.  A memory recalls as I look at the stove.  It was my parent’s anniversary, so Drew and I decided to make them breakfast.  I made chocolate chip pancakes and eggs, and Drew made sausage and bacon.  It surprised me that the pancakes tasted as good as they did.  Even though they were a success, I never made pancakes again after that.

 

Fifteen minutes go by and I’m almost done with my food.  It wasn’t until I took my last bite of pancakes that my dad, my mom, and Drew all walked in with a gift bag.  I couldn’t help but smile, even with bits of food in my mouth.  They all start saying how proud they are that they will miss me, but I was curious about what was in the bag.  So I took it and looked inside, and inside was a hoodie with my school logo on the front.

 

“You can put that on when you get there,” said my dad.  I gave out my “oohs and aahs,” but I truly liked this gift.  I got up and engaged in a group hug with everyone that lasted for about a minute.  The last group hug, I thought to myself.  This wasn’t the only last though.  Everything around me was the last.  The last time I will be in my room.  The last time in the kitchen.  It makes you want to relive everything you’ve done, only if that were possible.

 

I don’t know how fast the time went, but just like that I was in my car and ready to start my drive.  I stood against the car door looking out at my neighborhood.  I took in the fresh air of the summer morning.  I remember my dad, Drew, and I would run around the neighborhood playing football.  I’ve always loved doing fun activities with my dad.  He always kept things entertaining and fun, while at the same time he would make sure Drew and I acted correctly in public.  My dad inspired me to be a better man.  Looking at all the success he has achieved, I want that too.  I want to be the most honorable person I can be while raising a beautiful family, and that’s exactly what my dad did.

 

As I get into the car and start it up, my mom and dad walk out.  I saw a few tears under my mom’s eyes as expected.  She gave me one last hug through the car window, wrapping her arms around my neck.

 

“Remember, no parties until you finish studying,” she said as her voice cracked, trying to hold back her tears.

 

I smile to myself while letting go of her.  My dad walks up to the car, and we do the handshake that we have done for years.  The handshake transitioned to the hug.  I may have heard him crying as well, but maybe it was just in my head.

 

“Hey!” shouted Drew, running up to us.  “You left this in your room.”  He hands me the same alarm clock that I questioned this morning.  I take it and grin.

 

“Thanks,” I say.  I guess I am taking the clock with me after all.  I’m taking a piece of my home with me.  Everyday when I wake up, I’ll remember the house I was raised in.  My two parents and my brother.  All my memories with them will sing along with the clock that’ll sing the next morning.  We say our last goodbyes and I drive into the world.  Before I exit my neighborhood, I stop and look back into the rearview mirror.  A huddled up group of three people are waving goodbye.  Watching them wave made me realize that I will always have my family.  They will always be by my side when I need it, and I’ll always be by theirs.  Not only will my memories come from my clock, but they will come from my heart.  And from my heart, I can still hear their voices cheering me on.  And as I listen to them, I step on the gas.